The Maid of Cynicism

I do not claim to have more experience as a bridesmaid than many women. I have also been lucky in that the weddings I have been in have mostly been pleasant experiences. However, as many women know, when a close friend tells you she has gotten engaged, an internal monologue begins: How exciting! I wonder if she will ask me to be in it. I will be so mad if she doesn’t ask. Do I want to be in it? What if the dress sucks? Can I afford this? Why did I ever agree to be in it? Wait, has she even asked me yet?

Once Mandy asked me to be in the wedding (and the monologue concluded), I immediately agreed. Only seconds later did Mandy begin to explain how she wanted a green wedding — I began to have visions of a granola-paved aisle, organic cotton togas, and a sapling at each place setting. I knew I was in for an adventure. I have been friends with Mandy since our freshman year in college, so I was confident that the greenness would not be gaudy, but would be elegant, understated, and exactly what she and Sean would want.

Obviously, we started with the fun stuff – finding a bridesmaid dress. Well, it sounded fun. Then I realized we would have to take into consideration fabrics, body types, color, cost, locality, and (the one thing that is supposed to make everyone feel better about this entire process) will we ever be able to wear the dress again?! Since Mandy and I are girls who always take the bull by the horns – or the dress by the straps, in this case – we had, in no time, ordered 10 dresses from various websites (Banana Republic, Ann Taylor, J. Crew, and one nonrefundable leftover sample that only came in one size) and had them delivered to Mandy and Sean’s house. In perfect Mandy form, she immediately began planning a party for several of the bridesmaids to try on the dresses; a party replete with food, alcohol, dresses, local experts, and (every girls nightmare when trying on dresses) a film crew. Being that there really will be a film crew at the try-on party, I must go work out now, but I will write a recap post-event and may or may not include photos.